Faded Memories

"We're going to the Big Blue Park" says Katie. I remember the Big Blue Park as the Disneyworld of Sterling, Virginia. Anybody that's anybody knew of this joyful second home. Despite the fact that children find fun in everything, as we drove past fields and fields of green and brown, my stomach was filled with an unbearable excitement. This playground brings upon you a sort of happiness that a child desires. All my friends lined up side-by-side, swinging with the wind tunneling between us. There is no better cure to the after school disappointment than enjoying time with what seems like your best friends. However childhood friendships don't always come with a "forever".

One day we were strutting across the Big Blue Park like we owned the place, and the next I was disappearing away from them into the school bathroom enjoying a nice lunch hidden between two green walls. Our best memories came from long phone calls and endless conversations that ended in laughter, now we can barely make out the word "hello". Unfortunately the hardest part didn't come from learning to cope with the pain, it's the nights where I feel completely isolated and question how I even managed to ruin all my friendships. Every night is a constant battle of overthinking or not letting things get to me, but at the end of the day not all friendships will remain.

In all sixteen years of my life, the one trade-off of growing up that seems most obvious to me is that friends come and go.Whether it's enjoyed or not, life doesn't come with an instruction guide, but it does come with amusing moments that make it a little easier to suffer through the bad ones. When one door closes another one opens. My childhood friends might not still remain, but there memories will soon be filled with new ones.

Now I drive past the Big Blue Park and I smell the faded memories of friendships that were never truly there.